It Will Never Rain Roses
by Carleen
Summary: A bit of fluff about Jack and Sam. Kind of a, what if. They're a couple of swear words. Enjoy!


TITLE: _It will never rain roses: W__hen we want to have more roses we must plant more trees_ -George Eliot

CHAPTER: 1, It Will Never Rain Roses

LOCATION: SGC and Jack O'Neill's Lake House

* * *

"Just another damn routine mission," Colonel McNeill swore, as he rolled back to cover. There was an old Marine saying: 'The only easy day was yesterday.' That about summed up this mess. Another long day at the SGC and another routine mission that'd gone sideways. The MALP had fucked up by reporting a safe landing zone. Until they'd walked directly into a civil war between the indigenous people of P11-149. Unfortunately, SG1 had not walked into the winning side. O'Neill and his team walked through the gate and directly into the crossfire. Colonel O'Neill called out for them to take cover. That move forced them off the ramp and into a rocky area. Which fortunately provided them with cover, but had effectively cut them off from the gate.

Eight hours later Colonel O'Neill had gotten them positioned to get back through the gate. Then two of the Marines had taken fire. One of them dead before she'd made it back though the gate. Just before the mission, she'd been showing off pictures of her new baby son. Now the broken and bloody body of the new mom laid crumpled on the ramp. Major Carter rolled to a stop next to the dead Lieutenant. Her face blank and white with shock as she watch other marines carry their fallen comrade to the Infirmary.

"James Allan… she said, aloud, as Carter remembered the baby's name. James for his father and Allen for her father."

"Carter?"

The room slowly tilted and Carter sagged at the knees, as the last of the adrenaline faded and grief and exhaustion took its place.

Colonel O'Neill caught her by the arm.

"I'm fine sir!" She growled, twisting her arm from his grasp.

"Yes, ma'am. My mistake." The colonel watched her stride from the embarkation room. He stood silently watching; until he was the only one left in the room, the gate had closed and the iris closed shut. Silence. He dimly heard General Hammond summon him to the Infirmary. The sounds of the battle still rang in his ears.

"Come on, son. Dr. Fraiser's waiting for you." Finally, Colonel O'Neill responded to the general's hand on his arm.

"Yes, sir."

An hour later O'Neill stood in front of his locker attempting to hang his BDU shirt on a hook. He watched it float to the floor for the third time. Too exhausted to care, kicked his boots on top the the pile. He slammed the locker so hard Charlie's picture floated to the floor.

"Goddammit," he shouted. His frustration continued to grow, when after several attempts, he failed at getting the picture to stick to the locker door. He finally shoved the picture in his pants pocket and went in search of the tape. If anyone has tape, he thought, it was Carter. Apparently, not knowing or caring he was dressed in his stocking feet, pants and t-shirt he padded down the hallway.

Her office door was ajar and he found her sleeping with her head in her arms. O'Neill slipped quietly inside and closed the door firmly behind him. She hadn't showered or changed. So her blond hair was sticking out at odd angles. He fought the urge to smooth it down. He called her name once, but when she didn't respond he placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Sam?"

Colonel O'Neill had a rule for himself: He never touched his second in command. There were days when he could barely keep from touching her and days when he failed completely. He wanted to touch her hair and run his fingers through it. Was it soft or coarse? He wondered. That pulse point on her neck… _Get a grip, Colonel_.

"Major Carter?"

Carter's head came up quickly as if she'd been startled. Then to his surprise, his arms were suddenly full of Major Carter. She'd taken his hand from her shoulder and used it to pull herself up and and into his arms. He'd caught just a glimpse of her tear stained face before she buried it in his chest. Very glad he'd thought to shut the door, O'Neill wrapped his arms around the one woman he could never have. Professional relationship only. But his hand moved up to her head, combing his fingers through her hair. Spreading his long fingers over the back of her head he pulled her even closer. Oh, God, he thought, it's soft. I'll just hold her for a moment more. She needs this.

His ex-wife always expected him to the strong one in their relationship. That was fine, until he left for on a deployment. Then Sarah didn't seem to handle things very well. Fortunately, he could call her and talk her through things, but many times that was impossible. Then he'd come home to unpaid bills, a un-mowed lawn and an unhappy wife.

Carter was completely different. She made you want to prove yourself to her. Although he was aware of the chemistry between them. They'd made a silent but mutual decision not to pursue those feelings. Plus, he never really felt he was the right man for her. He didn't measure up. He knew it. She needed someone more like Daniel.

"Hey, how long had it been since you slept… in a bed?" He asked gently.

He felt, rather than heard, her murmur into his chest. He knew how long it had been. "Samantha, we all have a breaking point."

She shook her head in denial

"Yes ma'am. We do. All of us."

"My father would never allow it. She lifted her head scrubbing her face with her right hand, the other firmly locked onto the back of O'Neill's belt. Let's get out of here. Please, Jack... Sir. Get me out of this place" She pleaded urgently.

Colonel O'Neill caught a tear with his thumb. How did his hand get here? He was touching her face, holding her cheek in his hand. Her skin clear and soft. Her blue eyes wet with grief. She felt so fragile in his hands. Yet, he knew she was anything but.

"Are you sure, Sam?"

"Yes."

"Will you trust me?"

"Of course," she said, as if it were written in the stars.

"Do you need to stop at your place for a change of clothes or do you have some there. A jacket, gloves and boots?"

She nodded.

"Then let's go now. Before you change your mind."

In less than ten minutes they were buckled into the Colonel's truck and headed north. As Jack maneuvered his way of the city, he noticed Sam's head rolling back and forth on the headrest. After placing his jacket against his thigh and her own to use as a blanket he called her name.

"Samantha?"

"Mm?"

"You can lay down if you want to. See?"

Samantha gratefully stretched out across the seat with her head on O'Neill's leg.

After covering her with the coat, he brushed his fingers across her hair. He noticed it was damp. She must have taken a quick shower. He had too, but how had they not crossed path's in the locker room? _Stow it, O'Neill_.

"Sleep. You're safe now."

"I know. Yes, sir. Going to sleep... Safe." She sighed as she slid her left hand under his leg and curled the other into the hood of her jacket.

_It's going to be a long drive._

By the time Jack pulled into the yard of his cabin, the stars were shining bright in the night sky. A quick look at his watch told him it was 0100. Samantha was still sound asleep on the front seat. He pulled their bags from the bed of the truck and went inside to turn on the lights and fire-up the heater.

Major Carter woke abruptly, unsure of where she was. Sitting up she looked at the sky attempting to orient herself to time and place. Which mission? What planet? Where were Daniel and Teal'c?

"Colonel O'Neill?" She called out.

"Right here Major. Just coming to wake you."

"Wake me?"

Finally realizing she was sitting on the front seat of Jack's truck. She also noticed he was in jeans, boots and a thick cable knit sweater.

"Sir?"

"Come on, Carter. Out. Everything is ready inside. Water heating for tea, or if you'd rather have a drink?"

"Sir, where are we? She looked around in confusion. Wait, this is your cabin?"

"That is correct, Major. Now come on in," he said, extending his hand to her.

She eyed him with some confusion, but took his hand anyway. He lead her ceremoniously into his cabin

"Welcome to my humble abode." He said, waving her inside.

Her first impression was that it was very masculine. Her second, that it was exactly as she imagined.

A large country kitchen fireplace dominated one wall. Two overstuffed couches faced each other adjacent to the fireplace. Soft comfy throws were well placed, within reach. Books lined the the second wall. Everywhere she saw comfort, warmth and invitation. Much to her surprise she felt instantly at home.

The tea kettle whistled and without thinking, she said, "I'll get the tea."

Colonel O'Neill watched her enter the kitchen pull down two thick mugs and quickly make tea. A box of shortbread cookies retrieved from the pantry. The whole thing was on a tray in a few minutes. It wasn't until she was standing in front of him that she realized what she'd done.

Jack took the tray from her and when he did find his voice, said only, "Welcome home, Sam."

"I'm sorry," she laughed and shied away. "I don't know what made me do that… How did I know… ?"

They sat down, side by side, with the cookies between them.

After he refilled her cup a second time asked if she was feeling better.

"Yes, I am. Thank you, Jack. Thank you."

"Anytime, Sam. There's plenty more of those hugs left too," he said, quietly.

"If you're sure, Sir."

"Very sure, Major."

With that last reassurance Carter curled her legs up and snuggled against the Colonel's side. He accommodated her by extending his arm around her shoulders.

"So how long have you owned this place?"

"Just about four years. He wasn't ready yet to reveal the exact time he'd purchased this place. It included a dream he'd shared with no one. Not even Teal'c or Daniel. He'd finally gotten her up here and that was enough for now.

"What do you think?"

I think I like it every much. My first impression? Too masculine. Then I suddenly loved it and realized it was exactly as I always imagined it would be. I can feel myself relaxing. No wonder you enjoy coming up here. Can't wait to see it in the daytime."

They sat in silence for a while, just watching the flames. Jack broke the last cookie in half and feed it to her. She snuggled deeper and yawned.

"Speaking of daytime. I've had a nap. While you haven't slept in at least twenty-four hours."

"No worries... Gave up sleeping years... ago."

She laughed, "I imagine in Special Ops, they train it right out of you. But I do understand. Took me months to learn to sleep normally again after the Gulf."

Colonel O'Neill barley heard her because he was floating somewhere, in a delightful doze, where the smells and softness of a woman filled his senses. It had been a long time since he's snuggled with a woman. A very long time. She smelled so good and felt even better. The need to be closer to her flared up in him.

"Samantha?"

In his sleepy state, which kept him from censoring his actions, he pulled her up and onto his lap . Her knees landed on each side of his thighs and she slid comfortably down to his lap.

_Such a very long time._

"Sweet Sam," he breathed against her neck and pushing her hips down to meet his.

"Sir?"

"No sirs, here Sam," he whispered, as he explored her neck, breathing in her scent."

"Colonel O'Neill. Wake up."

"I don't want to wake up."

Carter had to laugh at the pout on his face. And, she needed to laugh or in about two more seconds she would kiss him. Really kiss him.

His hands slid down over her hips.

They were both startled by the sound of Carter's cell phone. Then someone rang the front door bell.

"What the hell?" He muttered, as he moved Sam over and headed for the door. Behind him he could hear Sam placating someone on the other end of the line.

"Yes, Sir. I am fine. I'll be back to work on Monday... Tuesday. I'm sure Colonel O'Neill is fine too. No General, I don't know where he is. Good night, sir."

Two Minnesota Highway Patrol Officers were waiting for O'Neill at the door. Concerned about trespassers they just wanted to check in. Sam watched O'Neill shook their hands and wished them good night. O'Neill closed the door, carefully locking it before he turned back to Samantha with a well formed apology ready. Inexplicably, she was giggling.

"Probably shouldn't bother locking the door. My father will be here any second."

O'Neill could only stare at her. All the blood had pooled in one place, which was making him dizzy from standing up and from thinking clearly in another. Then she was kissing him on the cheek and tickling his nose with her hair.

"Good night to you too, sir." Standing on tiptoe she kissed his cheek and with a casualness she didn't feel disappeared into what she hoped was the guest room.

~0~0~0~0~

The morning greeted Carter with the sound of ducks. Intrigued, she wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and slipped outside. The ducks were quacking and fussing with their babies. The Mallards stood guard, on the shore, importantly fluffing out their feathers. Out of the corner of her eye, movement drew her attention from the ducks. A doe and spotted fawn walked into the clearing. Carter stood still, trying not to breath. The young mother escorted her fawn to the water's edge. The little doe took a look at the water and back to his mother. Then it seemed to make up its mind and splayed out his log legs to delicately lap the water.

From the kitchen window, Colonel Jack O'Neill, stoic Special Forces commander, decorated Gulf War vet, and fearless pilot, watched the scene play out in the yard. He didn't notice the water faucet was overflowing the coffee pot. Instead, as he watched her, he realized that he'd never been in love before. He'd loved Sara, of course. But never like this. Never, with the slow thudding of his heart, sweaty palms and breathless anticipation. And, the need to ask her questions he hadn't thought about in so long he wasn't sure if he could make a sentence.

A few minutes later, O'Neill joined Carter on the back deck, handing her a mug of coffee.

"Mm, thank you." She said, with a grateful smile.

"Good morning. There's some nice hiking trails close by. But if that seems too much like being at work, he chuckled, we can just stay here. Whatever, suits your fancy."

"I noticed those bookcases. I think I would like to just sit quietly and read. That would be a real treat."

"I know what you mean, he agreed, clinking coffee mugs with her. Sam? Last night. If I owe you an apology..."

"You know you don't. She looked him directly in the eye. There's no need for secrets or embarrassment between us, Jack."

Well yeah, there was one, he thought shifting his gaze from her intense stare. But now was not the time to share it with her.

"Thank you for bringing me up here, Jack. It's beautiful and peaceful. I should have accepted your invitation months ago."

"Just happy you're here now, Sam."

She stepped into his offered embrace and she wrapped her blanket around his waist.

The hours slipped past as they shared meals, got a little drunk on the second night over a, take-no-prisoners game of chess, he prepared his specialty chili and she'd eaten it without shedding tears. She'd made him her special grilled pork ribs, with homemade coleslaw and home fries. They took turns making breakfast. Tried out a few of the hiking trails and spent peaceful hours reading. She'd cleaned out his coffee pot, which showed years of gunk build up. He swore that she ruined it, and then acquiesced, when he tasted the much-improved coffee. She'd also fixed the dishwasher that Jack claimed had not worked properly since day one.

On the fourth night, Samantha stood outside watching the moon rise. There was a storm moving in across the lake and the sunset had been gorgeous. However, Jack was nowhere around. The night sounds were filling in the quiet, as the daytime animals bedded down for the night. She missed his presence.

She heard his footsteps on the dock behind her.

"Samantha, there's something I want you to know I bought this place about four years ago. I guess. Well, it seems… Our circumstances have changed the changes it seems important to tell you now."

Samantha turned to look at him wondering why he was having so much trouble saying.

The moon slide behind a bank of storm clouds and it was suddenly very dark.

"I just want you to know… seems important now. Like it's time. Samantha, I've never invited another woman up here... Never intended to... Always thought... I mean, I only thought of you being up here."

"What? All those times you invited me here. Sir, I'm so..."

"No apology necessary, Carter."

"But."

"I'll make it an order," he said with a smile. Reaching up to her face, he touched her cheek and ran his thumb along her lower lip. His hands came to rest on her shoulders.

The moon came out from behind the storm cloud and now they could see each other's faces.

"You are so beautiful, he whispered. It occurred to him that he's seen her and thought about her beauty under many different scenarios and planets. This was their moon and their planet and for the first time in more years than he could remember he felt as if he'd come home. He and Samantha, standing on the dock watching the stars. Did she feel the same way?

"Jack?"

Hmm?

"I wish I'd come here sooner. Before. Before the other things."

"Maybe the time just wasn't right until now. He squeezed her, "Let's not dwell."

She nodded in agreement. "I want to tell you about Pete. Get it out and finished."

"And you are finished with him?" He asks, without a hint of his usual sarcasm

"Yes, completely. He is a good man. I know I did the right thing. Every time he came to town nothing felt right. As if I was forcing myself into as a role that wasn't right to me. Even the..."

"Samantha, his hands moved to her's holding them. Why did you choose him?"

"I allowed my father to convince me that I as was wasting my time, waiting for something I could never have. So I told myself what I really wanted was a normal life, a husband and a family."

"You can still have that Sam. Do you want kids? I'll do my very best to give you as many kids as you want. He said, with a grin that made her blush. What's this? Major Samantha Carter blushing?"

O'Neill placed his hand against her cheek to feel the heat.

She broke away from him.

"Do you know what feels normal to me? Her voice rising with emotion. This does. You are. Pizza night. SG1. A child, with Teal'c and Daniel as godparents. My father is gone so I can admit that I've never felt closer to anyone in my life than you three... You."

"I understand and I'm listening to everything you're saying. You know what seems normal to me right now?"

She was trapped, unable to move with the water behind her and the imposing figure of her CO in front of her. Things were about to change forever between them. He reached for her as he moved toward her. Suddenly she felt much unprepared to take this step with him, In fact, she was scared. Major Carter, scared? Never.

All those long suppressed feelings surfaced as he pulled her into his arms. He intended to kiss her. She avoided the entire issue by ducking her head to bury it against his chest. _Coward!_

Jack laughed; she could feel the rumble against her cheek.

"Sweet Sam, I'm pretty sure I will be kissing you before the night is over. 'Cause, I'm warning you honestly. You are mine now and I have no intention of letting you go again."

"Again?"

"I should have taken that damn engagement ring away from you, dialed an obscure gate number and thrown it across the galaxy."

"But, you didn't."

"No, Dammit, I didn't. I felt just as certain that you had to walk that path by yourself. I couldn't and wouldn't push you. Then there are the frat rules and the timing was never right and…"

"I understand. After so many years of hiding my feelings for you, Jack. I think I need a little push to cross over from the Colonel O'Neill my CO, to Jack the man who is about to kiss me."

"Yes, ma'am."

She didn't resist this time as he wrapped his arms around her and found her lips with his. This was his Sam. Not a replicated Sam or Sam from another time, but his Sam, under their stars and in their time. This was the Sam he intended to wake up next to for the rest of his life. Before all thought was driven away from the tentative touch of her tongue to his, he thought her next engagement ring would be as beautiful she was.

* * *

_What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined... to strengthen each other... to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories._

-George Eliot


End file.
